Over a year.

Its Jen. My moms been gone for well over a year. I can't help but to think of her right now cause of the memories she gave me. She through a halloween party for me and my class in 6th grade. My friends still talk about that day to this very day. She made an impression on them. Something that they will never forget. Im almost 18. In less than 2 months actually. I really wish she was here. More than anything. I have my school dance next saturday and Im going with the guy Ive had a crush on since freshman year. Mom was the first to find out that I had this crush on him. She would be so happy for me. She always told me to go after what I dream of. I finally did and shes not here. I miss her dearly. Things would be different if she was still here. I wouldnt regret coming home everyday. I wouldnt wish that I lived somewhere else. Id just have her. It would be like the old days when I came home to a warm dinner on the table. I bright smile no matter how her day went. No yelling, no complaining, just love. Thats all she gave. She gave so much love to other people that she never asked for it in return. I feel like I neglected that. If I could redo everything I would. I would tell her how much I love her. How much I cant stand to watch her go. I want her here to hold my hair back when Im sick, To hug me when Im gonna cry, to rock me when Im scared and tell me everything will alright. To care. When I think back I remember that no matter what I did wrong she still loved me with unconditional love. I was her one and only. I wish I realized this back then rather then now when its to late. I would do anything to have her back. To live with her and know that no matter what I have a home with a warm meal everyday, and of course... her unconditional love. I love her very much. No matter where she is... She will always be my mom.